Friday, April 15, 2011


Monday, April 11, 2011


Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Has it really been a month?

First, my truck was broken into. They forced open the hood, disconnected the battery, ripped out the driver's side door lock, tore out my stereo, stole a check, and also made off with my literally brand new running shoes. One of the things that got me through my NJ experience was the belief that I was building up karma points; that by going through something that miserable, I was buying myself some good times. It's amazing that I've already burned through all that good karma...


I woke up this morning with "Contagious" by Ron Isley stuck in my head. I have three thoughts on this:

(1) How the hell did that song end up in my head? I don't think it's been played on the radio in 10 years.

(2) "You're contagious/touch me baby/give me what you got" sounds an awful lot like a song about STDs.

(3) This song ushered in the new R. Kelly. The R. Kelly we all know and love. There would be no "Trapped In the Closet" or "Real Talk" without "Contagious." This mere fact places "Contagious" in the top 5 songs of all time. Hands down.


One thing I particularly hate: abrasive ringtones. I understand the need to hear your phone from across the street, but it doesn't need to be so loud as to drive the last bit of sanity out of me. Isn't there a nice Miles Davis ringtone you can use? Hell, I'll settle for Kenny G....


California's Employment Development Department doesn't answer their phones. It's not that they're busy and you stay on hold, it's that they have a message saying "We get too many phone calls so we don't answer them anymore. Good bye." If this isn't a lesson on the nature of government, I don't know what is. Now, about that health care....


Only once in my life have I ever given anything up for lent. I gave up fast food one year in college. As anyone who knows me is aware, I love Del Taco, and I would eat there 3-5 times a week. It was delicious, but was starting to take a toll on my wallet and my belt.

I'm not Catholic, so I don't know any logic behind lent, but it seems to me that most people give up something awesome, something that will be a sacrifice to go without. Sweets, chocolate, alcohol, sex, Del Taco, etc. Well I now fall in the Pantheon of these great things. I have been given up for lent. I've always known I'm something special. A real treat, if you will. But it's still nice to have it confirmed so resoundingly.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

More Ramblings...

First thing's first: I don't know how I never discovered how awesome bowling leagues are until now. But my Tuesday nights are amazing. This has highlighted one thing to me, though: bowling etiquette is 90% bullshit. People get SO pissed off if you bowl at the same time as them. Really? I suck at bowling, and I don't get distracted by you bowling next to me... It's not my fault you can't focus.


I love the jukebox, but not for the reason you think. I don't like to show off my eclectic taste in music, or find the longest song so I can "get my money's worth." No, I think the purpose of a jukebox is to punk everyone else in the bar. It's a bit of an art, really, to figure out the vibe of the bar, and pick out the perfect song to completely change the vibe to something opposite of it. Below is a list of go-to songs that successfully change the vibe in 75% of the bars around.

1. "I Saw the Sign" by Ace of Bace
2. "Mambo #5" by Lou Bega
3. "Wannabe" by The Spice Girls
4. "The Macarena" by whoever the eff sang "The Macarena"
5. "Tubthumping" by Chumbawamba

For further evidence of the greatness of jukeboxes, checks this out.


I recently got an awesome dog. Well, he's awesome 99% of the time. He really is great, but after bowling last night, I came home to find the dog sitting in a pile of blue cotton (recently pulled from a pillow), and gnawing on the wooden handle recently chewed off an umbrella. This could be an expensive 10-12 years...


The Saints won the Superbowl last week. I've never been more excited about anything, and I could write for hours about the game, what happened, what it means to New Orleans, what it means to the rest of the country, etc... But all I'll say is this: I was in Vegas for 4 hours one morning, and wanted to place a $50 bet on the Saints to win outright. Sadly, this was the middle of the night and the sports books were closed. Greatest disappointment of 2010 so far...


Speaking of Vegas, I just purchased tickets to Las Vegas in May. I have no idea who I will be going with, but they were $39 each way. At that rate, I might just go alone and gamble all weekend/drink for free. What could go wrong?

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Nanny Government Sucks

Yesterday, while driving through downtown Sacramento, I was pulled over by two bicycle cops for not wearing my seat belt. I was literally 3 blocks from home.

It's pretty easy to ignore the absurdity of being pulled over by a bicycle cop. What would they have done if I just took off at full speed? The only thing that stopped me from fleeing was not a fear that they could catch me, but rather a belief that the social contract relies upon cooperation with the police.

I interacted very politely with the officer, and as I handed him my paperwork I explained that it was a short trip downtown, and I had forgotten to put on my belt. Five minutes later he returned with a citation. This, needless to say, brought out my sarcastic side. The remainder of the conversation wasn't as polite.

This whole thing is a little ironic, because I've had several conversations about my very strong feelings toward seat belt laws. I could write a political philosophy paper on the issue, using terms like "executive power of the law of nature," and "self-regarding vs. other-regarding behavior."

In short, my argument is that because my decision makes no one else more or less safe, the government has no right to punish me for not wearing a seat belt (this is completely ignoring Ralph Nader's argument that seat belts lend drivers an air of invincibility, and therefore encourages them to drive more dangerously and endanger others).

If the government has a right to extract money from citizens who don't wear seat belts, then they also have a right to ban other dangerous activities. Skiing, skate boarding, and skydiving are all dangerous and have led to serious injuries to countless individuals. Following this logic, government also has a right to dictate healthy diets and ban junk food, greatly eliminating deadly heart disease, high cholesterol, diabetes, etc. Any justification for requiring the use of seat belts not only authorizes government to further infringe on our liberties, it obligates it to do so.

Friday, January 1, 2010

Happy New Year

One of the best things about New Year's Day is that it's an opportunity to measure yourself against where you were a year prior. In addition to setting out ambitious goals such as "lose weight" and "get out of debt," I think it's important to do a number of little things. Especially if you haven't your resolutions yet, I recommend some of the following:

1. If you don't have it already, get your passport. You never know when someone might want to surprise you with an international getaway, and you don't want to miss out because you don't have a passport.

2. Make a doctor's appointment and head off any medical problems that might exist.

3. Register your name as a website domain. It costs about $10 a year, and you never know when you might want it - and in the meantime, you can start using a cool e-mail address like ""

4. Subscribe to a magazine on a topic you know little-to-nothing about. Cooking, art, fashion, travel, and foreign affairs are all things we could all afford to be knowledgeable in.

Last year I set out a list of ambitious New Year's resolutions. I said I'd cut out fast food and regular soda, that I'd make sure I lined up my Master's degree, and that I'd make a clear plan to get out of debt.

I had a good deal of success with the fast food/soda deal (my stint in NJ aside), and as of right now I'm about 30 lbs lighter than I was at this time last year. Not only did I figure out when I was going to get my Master's degree, I actually have it hanging on my wall already. I am also intentionally ignoring the third one...

This year, I've made a new list of resolutions. In fact, there are just two ambitious goals I want to hit. I want to give up all soda - regular and diet - and I want to run a marathon in 2010. I fully understand exactly how ambitious both of these goals are, but I fully intend to dedicate myself to reaching them.